Why annotate a game treatment
Predator VR is a different kind of primary source again: not a screenplay, not a pitch document, but the narrative treatment for a licensed VR game — written in first person, from inside the player character's head, scene headers doing the job a slugline would in a script. Jesse's own line on the project, from the original post announcing it, was that it was "a chance to play with one of my all time favorite franchises." That first-person format changes what's worth annotating: alongside the usual craft notes, this page leans on narrative design — the discipline of building a space, an object, or a branch point that teaches the player something no line of dialogue has to say out loud. The design notes the writer left for himself in the margins (bracketed, in shouted capitals) are kept exactly where they landed.
My ship hangs in stealth orbit above the third planet from the local star. I have chased the trio of Bad Bloods across the galaxy. Following their bloody trail of wanton death and destruction. These are Yautja without honor. The criminals of our kind. They kill the innocent and the unarmed. The weak and defenseless. The trophies they take have no value. They blaspheme the legacy of our race.
We Yautja believe the hunt is sacred. A ritual that commemorates the evolution of our species. Our journey from groveling prey-things hiding in the trees, to Apex Predators roaming the stars. The survival of the fittest is our holy credo.
I am an Adjudicator. The ultimate Yautja bounty hunter. Less than 1% of my kind ever achieve this rank. To do so requires one lead at least five feral cleansings. I have led six. With the hides, skulls, and carapace to show for it.
When one of our kind goes rogue, it is my job to hunt them down and deliver merciless justice. To execute them before their rebellious taint can spread among the clans. And I must prevent the secrets of our tactics and technology from falling into the hands of our enemies. It is a duty I consider sacred.
The Bad Bloods I am chasing are some of the most aggressive, violent, cunning, and downright depraved hunters my kin has ever produced. It may prove difficult even for me. And I am the best. But for the natives of the world below me, surviving their marauding will be next to impossible.
The planet below is primitive. The dominant natives are barely out of their caves. They rely on rudimentary combustion and projectile weapons for their defense. The only challenge they have ever presented to Yautja Hunters has come as a result of their surprising wit and craft. Or sometimes their sheer numbers. When the bipedal primates work together they can swarm us like parasites, and have in rare cases, overwhelmed our most immature hunt-lings.
The detonation of one of a Yautja device has drawn me into synchronous orbit above a jungle in the southern hemisphere of this third planet. I don't yet know the circumstances of this explosion. It may have been the self-destruct device on a Bad Blood's wrist gauntlet. My investigation will begin at ground zero.
I prepare for my mission within the ready room of my ship. The low fog clings to the floor. The rune scrawled data columns around me. I regard the vast trophy-wall and receive my instructions. As the clicks, roars, and snarls of my language broadcast over speakers, the geometric blood runes scroll across the surface of the wall. Clouds of nano-mist provide a backdrop for holo projections: High altitude video scans of the jungle far below.
There is no trace of the stolen ship the Bad Bloods are using. And no Yautja life signs. As I begin my hunt, I will recover any Yautja technology the Bad Bloods may have left behind. The natives must be prevented from gaining access to our weapons. If any of the Bad Bloods are still alive. I will track them down and kill them. It is a most worthy hunt.
In success, I will be rewarded with rare trophies that I can trade in the markets of Altair. The metallo-mimetic trophy wall morphs before my eyes. Creating surface depressions for the skulls and spines of my quarry. When I kill the renegades and recover their gear. I will place the trophies within these depressions for catalog and tally.1
I gear-up (ADJUST AS NEEDED)-- Wrist Gauntlet. Cloak. Medicomp. Scimitar. Plasmacaster. Speargun. Glaive. Shuriken. Smart Disk. Plasma Pistol. Bio-Mask.
The holo-prog prompts me to verify every function. I am an Adjudicator. The best of the best. I know how to operate this gear just as I know how to breathe. But I follow the prompts as ritual. Thinking of all the hunters who have done so before me. These ruminations fuel my anger toward the Bad Bloods who have betrayed our legacy. They desecrate the armor and weapons they wield. Relics that have been carried into conflict over countless generations.
I will be the redeemer that executes justice and cleanses their gear with my righteous flamer. Burning their blasphemous taint into oblivion.
It is time to hunt. I go to a cylindrical DROP POD. A torpedo like projectile that will hurtle me down through the atmosphere and into the killing fields like an avenging angel. As I step into the pod, the black nano-mist seals around me.
NOTE: MAYBE CUT TO TRANSITIONAL SEQUENCE OF DROP POD GETTING FIRED OUT OF PREDATOR SHIP. AND ZOOMING DOWN TOWARD THE EARTH. THESE DROP PODS WERE USED IN PAUL WS ANDERSON'S AVP MOVIE. SEEMS LIKE A COOL WAY TO INSERT PREDATOR PLAYERS ONTO THE BATTLEFIELD IN VR.
DARIEN GAP – SOUTH OF PANAMA
The black gives way to light as the hatch of the Drop Pod opens and I step out into the jungle. My Bio-Mask comes online. The visor filling with information about the area. Sensors direct me toward the scene of the explosive detonation. I move to the edge of a clearing where the detonation occurred.
NOTE: THE SITE OF FINAL COMBAT IN THE HUMAN CAMPAIGN'S JUNGLE LEVEL.
I find a quartet of natives (NARCO MODELS) digging in the center of the blast area. They carry rudimentary firearms. One of them recovers a Yautja object, and shows it to his comrades. My sensors identify this as a PLASMA PISTOL. Left behind by one of the Bad Bloods. The primitive soldier accidentally triggers the device. Vaporizing one of his comrades.2 My involuntary laughter betrays my location. The humans turn toward me and open fire.
I take cover and engage. My survival is critical to the success of my mission. I must choose the mode and method of my attack with care. Do I use stealth? A frontal assault? Do I pick them off one by one? Or obliterate them with Plasma? Do I attack via the trees? Or move along the ground? The choice is mine.
I fight the humans. They are easy prey. I recover the Plasma Pistol. And place it behind my back, affixing it to my trophy rack. Collected.
As I inspect the ground where the blast occurred. My scanners identify the shattered remains of a Yautja. It is one of the Bad Bloods. Whether or not the others are still alive. I do not yet know. But the bones and gear of this renegade have been scattered across a wide area by the explosion. My visor extrapolates the trajectories and locations of these targets, indicating a direction of travel.
Before I move out to recover more artifacts. I hear the sound of approaching air vehicles. A trio of indigenous rotorcraft appears in the distance. Flying low over the trees. It appears that I am not the only one hunting for the Bad Bloods and their technology. I must move swiftly.
I come upon a larger group of locals. (NARCO OR LOCAL SOLDIER MODELS) They work in a channel of steep terrain and low ground. They are recovering a Yautja WRIST GAUNTLET. I engage these rabble. And recover the weapon.
But before I can move on, a hidden Sniper opens fire on my position. I move to cover. But I am attacked from another angle. The red beams of their lasers cutting through the mist. It would seem that the hunter has become the hunted. The snipers are in the trees. I hunt them down and kill them.
I move to a cluster of small shacks and exploded fuel tanks. A cluster of elite military forces are here. (SPECIAL FORCES MODELS WITH HEAVY WEAPONS) They have collected a number of Yautja artifacts including a BIO-MASK. I engage them. But these enemies prove more challenging. They have heavier weapons. Eventually I prevail, but one of their kind runs away with the Bio-Mask. I go after him.
I chase the native to a large clearing where the Rotorcraft I tracked earlier move in to pick him up. These air vehicles fire at me. Eventually I discern the pattern of their attacks and I take them down with my Plasmacaster. Blowing them up over the trees. I recover the Bio-Mask from the body of the last biped. This will be an important clue if I am to find the other two surviving Bad Boods.
NOTE: In the first recruitment scene on the human campaign. This incident can be referenced. Telling us that multiple helicopters were shot down. Establishing that there are competing forces of humans going after the Predator's technology.
PREDATOR SHIP – READY ROOM – ORBITING THE EARTH
Back aboard my ship. I add the trophies I have collected to the mimetic wall. My tally is calculated. Not a bad haul. But there is more work to do. The Bio-Mask I recovered is analyzed by my ship's automated systems. A fragment of data indicates the two surviving Bad Bloods fled this area in their stolen ship, flying to a Southern Region in the Northern Continent. A coastal city.
NEW ORLEANS – HURRICANE SEASON
My drop-pod opens and I step onto the roof of a building. This urban area is undergoing evacuation as a large storm moves into the area. I follow the sound of gunfire to find a gang of armed locals (GANGSTER MODELS) are fighting one of the Bad Bloods. The Yautja makes easy pickings of these natives.
I move to engage the Bad Blood. Our battle is complicated by more of the armed locals. There fire is not very accurate but it can deplete my health and reveal my position in a way that challenges my engagement of the Bad Blood. When I deplete the health of the Bad Blood he withdraws and I pursue.
My blood lust gets the better of me and I soon realize the Bad Blood has drawn me into a trap. The second Bad Blood engages me. Now it is two against one. When one of them engages me, the other moves to flank. The only way I can defeat them is to draw them toward a large group of armed locals.3
The attacks of these locals distract the Bad Bloods, buying me the opportunity to engage. As my attack proves successful, the pair of Bad Bloods split up. I can only pursue one of them.
NOTE: PER THE CHRONOLOGY OF OUR NARRATIVE, THE PREDATOR YOU DO NOT PURSUE WILL PARTICIPATE IN THE HUMAN CAMPAIGN.4
I follow the Bad Blood across the rooftops. Tracking him to the rooftop lair where the trophies of his kills hang from wires and antennas. The area has been secured with a variety of explosive mines. I must maneuver around them to catch my quarry. I finally corner the Bad Blood and defeat him in combat. I claim his trophy and recover his artifacts. Now I must find the final Bad Blood.
In the distance a Yautja ship decloaks over the city. I make my way toward it, leaping across the rooftops. The locals engage me with harassing fire from below. Some of them use ROCKET LAUNCHERS that prove more dangerous and slow my progress. I make my way through this gauntlet of fire to see the Yautja Ship is attacking a small building. Rocket Fire from the building damages the Yautja ship and it flies away over the city, damaged. My prey has eluded me.
NOTE: THIS LAST MOMENT ALIGNS WITH ACTION IN THE HUMAN CAMPAIGN.
PREDATOR SHIP – ORBITING THE EARTH
I place the trophies I have taken from the dead Bad Blood into the mimetic-wall. My tally is calculated. I have done well. But that one last renegade remains. Various trajectories of his escape route are calculated by my ship and displayed to me via holo-projector. This data indicates my quarry has been grounded in a frozen wasteland in the northern region of this planet. The Bad Blood and their ship have been captured and taken to a military compound in that area. I must drop directly into their midst. Using full hive extermination protocols. The site must be cleansed of all Yautja technology and bio-matter.
OMSK – SOUTHWESTERN SIBERIA
The Drop-Pod opens and I step out into the facility. I move through the facility in search of the captured Bad Blood and his ship. I use the catwalks and cross-beams to navigate the building. Avoiding the swarming soldiers who pester me with fire from their projectile weapons. It is their numbers that complicate my progress. Not the accuracy of potency of their gunfire.
I progress deeper into the facility only to be engaged by a small group of more powerful enemies. These aggressive bipeds are armed with hybrid versions of Yautja weapons. This is exactly why my mission is so important. No prey species must ever become armed with our own technology. And these enemies have rudimentary devices to enhance their vision. This enables them to see through my camo-cloak and make potent attacks. I dodge, leap, and kill.
Eventually I reach the large interior space where the Bad Blood renegade is being held prisoner and his ship is being analyzed by the natives for reverse engineering. I open the stasis tank holding the Bad Blood and prepare him for execution. But my delivery of justice is interrupted. A native warrior emerges from hiding and fires upon us. In the confusion the Bad Blood breaks free and fights me for his life. In the chaotic confrontation, the native prey-ling saves me from being killed by the Bad Blood and I return the favor, preventing the Bad Blood from killing the native. Together, we defeat our common enemy.
NOTE: WHAT I'M THINKING HERE IS WE TRY A SLOW MOTION CALL OF DUTY STYLE QUICK TIME EVENT THAT CAN BE MIRRORED IN BOTH CAMPAIGNS.
As the facility around me succumbs to fire, I collect my trophies and move to the Yautja ship to make good my escape. I abandon the lone bipedal warrior to his fate. If he is not careful, the afterburners of my ship's launch will roast him.
PREDATOR SHIP – ORBITING THE EARTH
I place the final trophies and recovered artifacts on the mimetic-wall. The cleansing fires remove their taint. My tally is calculated. My mission is complete. I begin the ritual removal and repair of my weapons. Justice done.
-- END OF CAMPAIGN --
- 1
Not "the alien has a trophy wall" — a wall that physically morphs to create individual depressions sized for skulls and spines, with an explicit cataloging function, set against clicks, roars, and rune-script scrolling across its surface. A generic version of this beat stops at "trophies line the wall." The specific mechanism — what it does, not just what it looks like — is what makes an invented ritual feel operational instead of decorative.
Haecceity - 2
Nobody explains what a Plasma Pistol is or that Bad Bloods carry them. A native finds one, the Predator's sensors identify it in the same breath, and it kills someone a sentence later. The object teaches its own danger through what it does, not through a briefing — the same mechanic repeats two paragraphs later when scattered bones and gear let the Predator extrapolate where the surviving targets fled. Both moments are read, not narrated.
Environmental Storytelling - 3
Two Bad Bloods at once is stated as explicitly unwinnable head-on — the only route through is improvised, using a third party's crossfire as cover. That's "kill the easy exit" as a literal constraint on the page, not just a screenwriting metaphor: the direct fight is taken off the table, so a specific tactical decision has to fill the gap it leaves.
Action as Decision - 4
The fork the whole document earns its keep on. Which Bad Blood you don't chase isn't a cosmetic branch — it's a consequence structure that reaches into an entirely separate campaign played by a different character. The marginal note is the writer answering, in real time, the exact question this design discipline runs on: if this had to fork right here, what would the fork actually be?
Script vs. Emergence
What this excerpt doesn't show
This is the Predator's half of a two-campaign design. A second document follows a human soldier recruited into a government task force built to hunt the same threat, crossing paths with this campaign at the two beats the marginal notes above point to. That second campaign is a different playable character with its own, separate set of design problems, and it's kept out of this excerpt so the throughline of one complete campaign — setup, three recoveries, finale — stays intact rather than getting cut into two unequal halves.
Read the whole thing
The full project writeup — genre, modes, and how a version of it reached VR arcade release — is on the original post: Video Game Narrative: “Predator VR” →
Related pages
- What Is Haecceity? — the specificity principle behind note 1.
- Environmental Storytelling and World Logic — the technique behind note 2.
- How to Write Action Scenes: Decisions Under Pressure — the framework behind note 3.
- When to Script and When to Design for Emergence in Interactive Storytelling — the diagnostic behind note 4.
About the author
Jesse Alexander is a screenwriter, showrunner, and narrative designer whose work spans film, television, games, and transmedia storytelling. Scribbler’s Toolbox collects practical frameworks developed from professional story development and production.